We Need People

Have you seen the movie Cast Away starring Tom Hanks? His plane crashes in the ocean and he floats onto a deserted island. Stripped of modern conveniences, he teaches himself how to survive. He learns how to catch food, make shelter, and fire. But he soon discovers the one thing he can’t make, other people. So he did the next best thing. He made Wilson. He was so lonely he used a volleyball for companionship. And this illustrates the reason for this article perfectly: Without other people, we don’t exist. 

You might have heard this question before, “if a tree falls in a forest, and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?” Let me ask this question another way. If you fell and hit your head, and no one is around to see it, did it really happen?

You see, without other people, we don’t have the feedback to know we exist. When someone responds to your email, or says hi to you on the street, they are saying, I acknowledge your existence. But if they ignore you, they are denying your existence.

This explains why social media has captivated the eyes, ears and fingers of the world. Social media makes people feel alive. And I mean this is the very literal sense of the word. Being known. Having a platform with a million pairs of eyes staring back at you, is the height of validation. It makes anyone say, “see, look how many people love me. I do exist.” 

But then I started to realize—okay, if I need people to exist, does that mean if I know more people I will exist more? This thought turned my attention to the world of networking. What are the benefits to a large network? Is life about attracting eyeballs? To be attractive, is to have the means to attract other people. People will get plastic surgery, inject botox into their face and go through other extreme means to be attractive. I comb my hair. I take showers. I workout to improve my physique. All to be attractive. This must run deep in our DNA. Is everything we do for other people? 

Imagine being the last person on earth. No one is there to see your accomplishments. No one is there to say congratulations. No one is there to be in awe. No one is there to share experiences. It would be pretty horrible. There is a reason why kids are always saying, “look at me look at me!”

Action is attractive. Action attracts. Action pulls people in. And the more valuable the action is to that person, the more it attracts. To know what is valuable to others is the secret. Valuable to others and in limited supply. Value that is scarce. 

This might be the true primordial desire. More than food or shelter. It’s other people. Without other people our lives are the fallen tree with no one around to hear it or see it. It doesn’t exist. We literally need other people to exist.  

So what the hell David, what is your point with all this? I’ll wrap up this post with this—take action, attract people, create value for yourself that creates value for others. Don’t do things for applause or money unless it creates value for others. Be valuable.